RRP GROUP FOR PARENTS

RRP groups are focused on processing and recovery from childhood trauma. That focus makes the group experience similar for all participants. No matter what age or at what stage of life we are, the RRP group model fits for every survivor of childhood trauma. That also includes the various experiences we have had and are currently involved in. Whether we are or are not involved in an intimate relationship or whether we are or are not parents, does not change the RRP process of growth and recovery. People of all backgrounds and walks of life can be in an RRP group together and share the incredibly powerful RRP process towards, as Amanda Curtin, the founder of RRP explains, finishing business with our family of origin and reclaiming intimacy.

And yet, parents sometimes feel an additional burden to the trauma they carry as survivors of childhood trauma. Raising children while healing from our own childhood trauma carries worry about not passing on intergenerational trauma, which refers to the passing on what we have experienced to the next generation. The focus in RRP groups is our own childhood trauma and that is the best antidote to passing on trauma to the next generation. Parenthood is an intense experience and can trigger a lot of overwhelming emotional reactions even among parents who grew up in well adjusted homes with secure attachment to their caretakers. (Check out Patrick Teahan's you tube videos on attachment styles, if you have not already). For those who experienced trauma, abuse and or neglect in our own childhoods, raising children can be especially triggering. Daily interactions with our children can trigger memories of our own childhood and we can experience emotional flooding.

"Ghosts in the Nursery" 

In 1975, a clear understanding of how and why trauma can be unintentionally passed on to a next generation was publicized by Selma Fraiberg, a clinical social worker and child psychoanalyst. She introduced the metaphor of “ghosts in the nursery.” This concept refers to the relationship between a parent’s early, often harsh or traumatic experiences from childhood and the parenting style with which they were interacting with their own children. Young children who are abused by their parents can exhibit similar behaviors when they become parents themselves. Sometimes they don’t remember the abuse, sometimes it’s what they consider to be “normal” because it’s how they were raised. These “ghosts” can reappear throughout generations, contributing to a cycle of abuse.

According to Dan Hughes, founder of Dyadic Developmental Psychotherapy (a model of dyadic therapy between parents and children, aimed at repairing attachment ruptures), at times unresolved childhood trauma causes a state of "blocked care". In order to create secure attachment between parent and child, the parent would benefit from resolving their own childhood trauma in order to be open to connection in a different way than the way we were raised.

I have met the most sensitive and dedicated parents in my work with RRP group participants. They bring incredible care, love and dedication to their parenting. RRP enriches both their awareness of the ways in which trauma affects their relationships with their children and their confidence in being able to make healthy choices for their own children.

Joining an RRP group for parents is a powerful way to gain additional support as parents for the amazing and very challenging task of parenting, while processing and recovering from our own childhood trauma.